Carbon Dioxide Automobiles

October 3, 2007

There’s an easier way to say that, but here’s the thing:

An absolutely unbelievable number of people are landing on my website doing searches for the above. None of them stick around, mind you, but I did the search myself and sure enough - I am the number three hit on Google for the contraction of the title of this post.

There are some other oddball searches that have shown up in the past for my site. Most of them were one-shots and never resurfaced. But with this one?

Well, the good news is that if any of them stick around to look at the art, maybe I’ll gain some new fans!

Speaking of which, I have posted a gallery of newer stuff at the website if you’re just clamoring for new ideas to wallpaper your bathroom with. Covers 2007, with more additions to be made later.

Not to mention, lunchtime today will hopefully see me posting Teresa and Brian’s big day! Stay tuned!

Posted in: bloggy business, huh? 1 Comment »

More Bizarre Visions

August 9, 2007

Thanks to the bizarre magic of Burger King and The Simpsons, here is how I might end up were I ever a guest voice on the show.

Well, the outfit is correct anyway.

Posted in: huh? 5 Comments »

Bizarre Visions

August 9, 2007

Today on the way to work I was thinking about the Music Express. You know, that carnival/amusement park ride where you get in a car that goes round and round in line with a bunch of other cars while rock music plays really loudly over speakers that have been tortured for way too long.

I was wondering what it would be like if they played old Philip Glass records instead. There’d certainly be some kind of demented nature to spinning around while berserk arpeggios play in your ears, but my favorite part was imagining the conclusion of the ride:

Many of Glass’ pieces end abruptly, with the whole Ensemble building up through an overpowering crescendo to an abrupt silence that ends the piece.

So the ride, of course, should also hit the brakes and screech to a stop violently and abruptly - which would result in everyone flying out of their seats and landing on the car in front of them.

OK. Now go picture it. I burst out laughing in the middle of the subway car. Hell, I’m still chortling about it right now.

Bizarre.

Posted in: huh? 2 Comments »

Huh?

August 2, 2007

Rolling Stone, in their wisdom, has published a list of the “25 Most Underappreciated Artists“. I’ll admit that I have been exposed to some good stuff due to 1) a few years of boarding school 2) art school and 3) city dwelling in general. But honestly - do they really think that these bands are slipping through the cracks? Please!

1. Tom Waits
Everyone I know goes through a bit of a Tom Waits thing at some point or another. In fact, owning Frank’s Wild Years earns you 3 credits at most art schools and many universities.

2. The Replacements
Are you kidding?

3. Cheap Trick
OK.

4. Sonic Youth
Oh, come on. Yeah, sure, Sonic Youth need more appreciation. They’re perpetual indie rock luminaries whose position is guaranteed for all eternity. Unless you’re still grumpy about the little wobble that was “Bull in the Heather”, you must admit that they haven’t really messed up their cred, survived Geffen with grace, and continue to wow forward-thinking music fans.

5. Warren Zevon
I can’t read too many music articles without his name coming up one way or another.

6. Big Star
OK, I’ll bite: who?

7. The Pharcyde
See #6.

8. Roxy Music
Huh? Brian Eno was a founder. That translates to permanent hip status. Even the ultra-smooth Avalon, which would have vanished if it had been by some crap band like Johnny Hates Jazz, continues to sit on Top Whatever album lists.

9. Talking Heads
I’m not even going to address this.

10. Bob Seger
Well, alright. I get this one. Like Journey, there’s really no better way to drive around America wasting gas and feeling all immortal-like than with a Bob Seger song. Unfortunately, he does take a lot of guff for simply being Bob Seger. But… I’m willing to bet that his greatest hits albums sell pretty damn well. Even I own one of them. Weren’t expecting that, were you. (well, maybe you were)

11. Fugazi
Ooh, really digging up the obscure bands, aren’t we?

Rolling Stone, for whatever reason, did not actually have a 12 in their list. Why? I don’t know. But since they interrupted my flow of smug musical rantings with inconsistency, I’ll just say that my comments would be pretty much the same for the below bands.

In summary: Are they kidding? Is this list for real?

Tom Petty? Yeah. He’s a real underdog. Full Moon Fever didn’t sell for shit.

13. The Cramps
14. The New York Dolls
15. The Band
16. The Cars
17. Pogues
18. Alice Cooper
19. Dinosaur Jr
20. Sleater-Kinney
21. Hüsker Dü
22. Devo
23. Wilco
24. Tom Petty
25. Ween

I’ll find out who Big Star and Pharcyde are, in case I’m doing my part to under-appreciate brilliance, and if you see anything that you don’t know, well, see? Rolling Stone was right.

Get crackin’.

For the record, tons of people appreciate these bands, myself included. If you don’t know Hüsker Dü, well, I’m sorry. You are Rolling Stone’s moron target audience. Get thee to a record store pronto.

Who do I think is genuinely underappreciated?

a-ha.

No, I’m serious. A stupid name, a perky bubble gum hit, and too many cheekbones to really be taken seriously by Americans, they got the short end of the deal over here. There’s some great stuff past “Take On Me”, most of it with a sculpted pop bent (if that’s going to be an issue, then fine, don’t bother) and an interesting way with melody. Sure, they’ve done stuff I think is crap, but so has most bands that I get into.

Posted in: huh? 3 Comments »

Ted Turner Sends Little Moon Man to Give Boston the Finger - Entire City Loses Its Shit and Shuts Down

February 1, 2007

I just can’t get over it.

What planet are we on? Does this strike anyone as impossibly stupid?

OK. Little device with lit up LEDs - I can see how that might get people a little worried.

But did anyone stop to look at this thing? It’s a little weird character! Giving the finger!

Did people think this was bin Laden’s idea? That this was his way of sending us little warnings that Logan Airport is just as crappy as it used to be and is totally open to more problems? If that is truly how his sense of humor works, I must admit the very idea would give me the tiniest sub-atomic particle of respect for the man.

Mumbles Menino is of course blubbering and sputtering his indignation for the world to hear, never once admitting (as far as I can tell) how dumb they were to jump to the most extreme of conculsions without stopping to think about it. My favorite part was how the MBTA blasted one of them with high-powered water jets to destroy it.

“Kill the mean little moon man! KILLLL IT!”

Where was the grey clay to look like plastic explosives? How about some cardboard tubes painted up in red with TNT in big, black Arial Bold?

Are you kidding me? OK, fine. Vigilant, careful, ready for anything. Sure. I feel sooooo protected I can barely breathe. I won’t even get into the amazing inconsistency of what triggers their panic buttons and what doesn’t.

It all reminds me of a very, very similar case of complete hysteria that they can’t just admit was a totally demented over-reaction to nothing: Steve Kurtz. All I’m gonna say.

My prediction: next they will be claiming that the Andre the Giant campaign was, in fact, secret indicators of where sympathizers can meet and connect with cladestine al-Qaeda pockets.

Concept art = terror? Is that the equation?

It just keeps getting weirder and weirder.

Posted in: huh? 1 Comment »

Big Hair

January 25, 2007

The archive pictures appear to amuse people, and as I haven’t really got anything new to show, here’s a few more.

Once upon a time my hair started to inflate and rise to the heavens. Sometimes it worked pretty well.

This, of course, is me and my sister at her wedding about 100 years ago. We do look wonderful, don’t we?

Sometimes, on the other hand, my big hair contributed to an overall complete fashion disaster.

Dreadful.

This is a three generations photo, surrounded by two guys I would have gotten absolutely nowhere without.

Be sure to click on the image - you really should get a closer look at my Grandfather’s fantastic trousers. Some of the items in his wardrobe were absolutely legendary.

I don’t miss the big hair. It was kind of a pain, and as I worked my way well into the 90s it became more of a public oddity. I went through a long hat phase (I think it was attached to my head once or twice in that time) while I decided what to do about my apperance. Now I have it buzzed down as close as possible without just having my head shaved.

Seems to work.

Posted in: huh?, photo 3 Comments »

Turd Appears on MIT Building

December 12, 2006

I usually miss MIT’s infamous hacks. I am on the other side of campus from the Great Dome, where all the really good ones seem to live. This morning, though, I noticed this apparition on the side of the Stata Center.

It might be a snowman. Or Waldo (as in, “Where’s Waldo?”). Perhaps there is someone giving a lecture somewhere that this relates to.

The real mystery, though, is that brown thing.

Kind of looks like poo.

If you were here you’d notice it gently drifting back and forth in the breeze, and the odd paint job that gives it kind of an uneven, diet-influenced appearance.

I have no idea what this is all about.

Methinks I’m just not clever enough for this school.

(turns out, it was supposed to be Waldo, and that’s supposed to be his cane. his really, really small cane.)

Posted in: MIT, filler, huh? 1 Comment »